Dating Over 60: Finding Love and Companionship in Your Golden Years
It is not, in fact, too late to look for love, a casual romance, or even a one-night stand at any age. Thankfully, older people are not more active in terms of finding a partner to share their retirement with.
Whether you’ve registered on a senior dating app and are looking for love there, or trying the old-school way of meeting people in real life, we have great recommendations and tips for you to master 60 and over dating.
Why dating over 60 is a new adventure
Making the decision to engage in online dating over 60s is not an easy one. Maybe you’re on the market because of a divorce after a long marriage, maybe you’re mourning the loss of a spouse, or, perhaps, you’ve not found the love of your life yet.
Any of those circumstances are somewhat traumatic, and it’s only natural if you’re hesitating about internet dating for over 60’s.
However, we don’t want you to miss out on the joys of dating later in life, finding companionship and passion with another human being who’s also had a whole different life separately from you.
There are so many benefits and joys of venturing out to dating sites for seniors over 60:
- You know what you want. You’ve lived a long life, and by now you have complete clarity over what it is that you want and need from the other person. You’re confident about your values and priorities, and you’re not afraid to admit it. All that makes finding a match simultaneously harder but also easier. It might take you a while longer, but you’ll much more likely end up with someone very compatible with you.
- No pressure to get married, have kids, live together, or anything else. The good and the bad thing about being older is that society kind of forgets about you in many ways. You’re not pressured to move to the next relationship milestone, you’re not questioned about starting a family, and the career topic is also pretty much irrelevant. Your romance is free to develop any way it wants. This means you can focus on the truly important things, such as your happiness and fulfillment, whatever shape or form it comes in.
- Companionship means so much more at this point in life. Some of us lose lifelong friends at that age, and many of our family members are gone too. Paired with solid age and life experience, this makes people value companionship more than passion or short-term relationships. You get to enjoy each other’s company, find joy in sharing daily tasks, and discuss everything that’s going on around you.
- No mind games. There must be elderly people who still enjoy mind games, gaslighting, manipulating, etc, but for the most if that’s ever been a part of their lives once, – it’s in the past now. With age comes emotional maturity, and satisfying your ego is no longer that appealing. As a result, logging into a dating site for seniors over 60 is a much more peaceful and pleasant experience. If you match – great, if you don’t – that’s alright too. And should any conflicts arise – you have ways of handling them like the two mature adults that you are.
There is this ageist narrative that romantic relationships are reserved solely for younger generations. But that is as far from the truth as it gets. As long as you’re a living and breathing human being, you want and need companionship, and love is not out of the question either.
A couple of decades ago, senior dating was not something you’d actively choose to do, but often more of an accident. These days, people realize that it doesn’t make any sense to stay lonely and alone only because society thinks that’s how you should live.
If you ignore social judgment and challenge the stereotypes, you can have lots of fun with new people you would have never met if it weren’t for senior dating sites for over 60.
Famous people getting together after 60s
We have to admit, the world that famous and rich people are living in has always been and will always be different from ours. What they can do and be praised for, normal people are frowned upon.
Still, there are many older couples who found each other as they entered their 60s and even 70s, from whom we can draw inspiration.
- Harrison Ford met Calista Flockhart when he was on the older side, and married her in his mid-60s.
- Rupert Murdoch and Jerry Hall also married after they celebrated their 60th birthday.
- Tina Turner married Erwin Bach in her 70s.
- Kris Jenner, the matriarch of the Kardashian-Jenner clan is currently dating Corey Gamble, who is 25 years younger than her.
Navigating the world of online dating for seniors
Depending on how much you’ve dated later in life, and how familiar you are with technology, dating online can be a little bit more or a little bit less stressful.
Whatever it is, worry not! We’ve come prepared, and below you’ll find many helpful tips for you to navigate online dating for seniors like a pro.
Sign up on the dating app and set up a good online profile
First things first, register on the dating app and fill in some information about yourself.
Tip: If you want to see some real-life examples, google: ‘dating profiles over 60 female examples’, and you’ll see many options that you can draw inspiration from.
There are several keys to success in setting up a profile and a bio:
- Add multiple photos. Let the people see you! Make sure the photos are good quality and shot in good lighting too. Don’t add group photos or photos with your family, just you is enough. Also, try not to add photos from 15 years ago, they need to be recent so the person doesn’t feel like you’ve lied to them when you finally meet.
- Write a couple of sentences about yourself. Avoid lengthy storytelling, be brief. Mention what you do, what you like, your passions, or what you expect from dating.
- Avoid lying. It’s very tempting to paint yourself as someone slightly better than you think you are. But please don’t do that. First of all, you’re more than enough just the way you are. Secondly, the lie will come to light when you meet, and it will be very awkward for you.
- Don’t get stuck with cliches. Traveling, reading books, watching movies – all that is fine and well, but make sure there is something about your profile that truly stands out. Maybe you can do a cool party trick or you have an odd interest that many of your relatives and friends don’t understand. Those kinds of things are what sets you apart from everyone else and help you find your people.
- Avoid sharing personal information. It’s enough for users to know your name and see your face in the photos. Elderly people, like everyone else, can be prey for online scammers. Make sure your address, email, phone number, full government name, the exact location where you live, etc stay private. Don’t add any of those to your bio, and double-check the photos too. Sometimes we take photos in front of our houses, have banking cards visible in the frame, or leave other elements that can help track us. Not to scare you, but all this data can be used to manipulate and scam you.
If you’re not sure about your profile, ask a friend or someone you trust to have a look at your profile. They might be able to identify something you missed and make a huge difference to your senior dating experience.
Start with a meaningful conversation
Now that your dating profile is all set up, and you have started to match with interesting people, the next step is to engage in a conversation.
Here are some tips to get you started:
- Don’t be afraid to be the first to text. Man or woman, whoever starts the chat is not so important. Too many people match on dating websites and apps, but never end up having a conversation. Either they’re both shy, not so interested, or think the other person has to do it. If you do that, you miss out on so many potential love stories.
- Show genuine interest in the other person. It’s okay to start with ‘How are you doing’ kind of questions, but they should be followed up with something more personal, such as questions about the photos they’ve uploaded and things they wrote in their personal bio, interests, plans for dating, or anything else really. Just make sure you’re not following the shallow small talk chit-chat. There’s nothing wrong with it per se, but just why bother? You didn’t wait for your 60s to chat nonsense with strangers online, did you?
- Maintain a balance. Communication is a two-way street. Make sure both of you get to share their life stories, talk about hobbies, and ask questions. You need to open up to others if they are vulnerable with you, otherwise it feels weird.
- Keep it positive. There’s no need for negativity when you’re only starting to talk to someone you matched with. Keep the tone light, joke when appropriate, share light-hearted stories with each other. Life is tough and we know it, you can get to it later, but for now – let’s be positive and focus on getting to know each other better.
- Try to listen more than you talk, and be attentive to what they’re saying. You already know everything about yourself, right? This means that it should be far more interesting for you to hear what the other person has to say. Pay attention to what they’re saying, ask follow-up questions, bring those things up in conversations down the line. Also, make note of potential future dates. Maybe your match loves modern art, and you find out there is a new exhibition in the local museum. Boom! You have a perfect and nonchalant way of asking them out.
Tip: As you go on with the conversation, don’t let the initial infatuation blind you from seeing their red flags. Just because you’re both a similar age and you matched doesn’t mean you’re destined for each other. Sometimes it’s hard to admit that the person we’re interested in is not a good match, so we choose to ignore any possible incompatibilities. Don’t do that though. There are so many seniors out there who can make you happy if you let them.
Building healthy relationships over 60
There’s no universal guide for building a long-lasting, loving, and healthy relationship for people over 60, but there are key principles you can follow to help you get there.
- Be honest about your expectations from the romance, for example, if you are looking for a long-life partner or a short fling.
- Lead with empathy and attentiveness, especially at the start of your going out. We don’t really know what other people are going through right now or went through before they met us.
- Have the sex talk. Sex is a part of the romantic relationship at any age. It may look a little different for different age groups, but it’s not going away. Discuss what you both want in the bedroom and see if either of you is ready for compromises.
- Be prepared to change your routine. Dating is always disruptive to our ways of living, usually in a good way. As we get older, we get more attached to how we do things, and it can cause some tension when you let a new person into your life. Try to embrace it, instead of feeling bitter. After all, you now have this amazing person to spend time with! Who cares if something about your day changes because of that? You wouldn’t want to keep things as they are and be alone, would you?
- Discuss the boundaries. Both of you need to know what’s acceptable and what is off-limits. This is not very romantic, but it’s paramount in order to have a strong partnership.
- Maintain your independence. Sometimes we need to spend some time apart to love each other more. Even if you’re happy to be around each other 24/7, don’t do it. Leave some space in between to allow time for personal hobbies and interests, meetings with friends and family members, and just some alone time.
Learn from your past relationships
By the age of 60, you’ve probably had a fair share of dates and relationships. Don’t let all that knowledge and experience go to waste! Remember the past dynamics, the good and the bad, and the lessons you’ve learned from it.
Try to let go of past preconceptions, and don’t let your past dictate your future either.
Remember that everyone you meet from now on is a new person, and they have their own experiences and ideas, and they won’t behave like your past lovers. So don’t treat them like your exes either.
Dating over 60 FAQ
What is a red flag when dating in your 60s?
There are many red flags someone in their 60s may have. Yet, at this point in life, it’s definitely odd if they’re not willing to be open and honest with you. It seems like at this age, there is no point in playing games and withholding information unless they have something serious or shameful to hide. Either way, confront them gently, see what their reaction is, and decide whether you’d like to stay or not.
Other common red flags for seniors are asking for money (a very common scam), permanent negativity about anything and everything, and overdependence to the point where they want you to cut ties with their family.
What are the odds of finding love after 60?
Finding love is not really easy, whenever you try to do it. However, looking for a soulmate in your 60s actually looks more promising than earlier in life. Think about it, your kids are all grown up, your career is no longer a big focus of yours, and you have enough free time to explore new acquaintances. Finally, at this age, you know yourself and know what you want. Lots of young people meet when they’re still trying to figure out who they are, and their relationship doesn’t work only because of them being at different stages of their lives. At 60 and older, this is no longer relevant.
What is dating after 60 really like?
Dating after 60 is freeing. You can do whatever you want with whoever you want. You’re not burdened by any expectations except your own, and you can find a partner simply to hang out with, as raising a family or building wealth is no longer something you’re focused on doing (unless you want to, of course).
What does a 60-year old man want in a relationship?
Every man over 60 is different, but something many retirees want is companionship and emotional support. They want a person to enjoy life with, someone they can trust and respect, and have a good time doing anything.