Relationship Soft Launch and How to Not Mess It Up

Today we’re going to help you with this last question – when to go out and tell the world you’re in a relationship. And how to do it gently, via the soft launch. 

What is a relationship soft launch?

What the hell is a soft launch in relationships, you may ask. Well, simply put, the meaning of a relationship soft launch is posting your partner on social media, but in a sneaky way. 

You’ve probably seen hundreds if not thousands of photos on Instagram of the girl sitting on a restaurant table with a guy’s hand casually lying on the table or holding a drink. And then there’s no tag of the guy! Or caption! And you can’t see his face, so there’s no way to find out who that is, and what’s going on. 

The intention here is clear – it’s to tease and tell without telling. This girl posts to let the world know she’s not single anymore, but she’s not ready to drop the big bomb and show the new partner’s face just yet. 

Why would you do a relationship soft launch?

You might be wondering, why go through all this trouble and create mystery and drama for no reason? Why not just post the boyfriend or girlfriend, and move on with your life? There are several reasons why someone might choose to go with a soft launch first. 

• For privacy reasons. If you’re a very private person, sharing your lovers online might not be something you’d be willing to do. 
• To avoid gossiping. Sounds counterintuitive in a way, because when you’re posting teasers, you’re opening the door to all sorts of scrutiny. With a soft launch though, at least the gossip is not directly targeted at your new partner.
• It’s too early for a hard launch. The relationships might still be too raw and young to announce for the world to see. But if you’re happy and excited, and want to share at least something, but you’re not at the secure stage of the relationship yet, then soft launching is the optimal way to go. 
• You’re not sure it will last but want to share. Not all relationships are intended to be long-term and committed. Sometimes we date casually, hook up, or get stuck in situationships. If that’s the case, You’d probably not want to share the big news in case you guys break up in a couple of weeks. For those in doubt but willing to share (or brag, nothing wrong with that too), soft launching a relationship with a sneaky post is a good solution. 

Soft launch vs hard launch

If soft launch is posting someone online without really showing them, then hard launch is going all in. Think of Kylie attending the concert with Timothee. Can’t go any harder than that! 

A hard launch is very different from a soft launch of the relationship. Here are the key points of both concepts.

Soft launch:

1. You can’t see the face of the new partner in the photo
2. The image suggests a romantic relationship but not explicitly 
3. There are no tags that could link to the partner’s account 
4. The caption doesn’t share the name or any other personal details 

Hard launch:

1. You can see the new partner clearly in the photo 
2. You can tell these people are in a relationship based on the image 
3. There are tags to the partner’s account 
4. You can see the name and/or other personal details of the partner 

Basically, a soft launch is all about a mystery and making followers cry for more. With a hard launch, there’s no secrecy, we know exactly what’s up. 

How to soft launch your relationship

When to do a relationship soft launch is something only you know. As for how to do the soft launch, the Once team is here to help! We’ve collected a few tips from experts and personal experience to make sure your relationship soft launch goes smoothly. 

First of all, pick your format: 

• Photo
• Text post 
• Reel/TikTok video
• Instagram story

Most people opt for photos or Instagram stories to do their soft launch. Also, it’s common to first post sneak pics in stories, and then do a feed photo a few days or weeks later. Not everyone watches stories, and once 24 hours are up – they’re gone forever. So, in a way, it’s a soft launch within a soft launch. 

With texts, you can post romantic quotes from books or songs, or straight-up mention that you’re seeing someone and feel wonderful about it. Videos are a bit more complex to produce, if they have scenarios, and do not just show your surroundings. If you and your partner are up for it though, it could be a fun activity for the two of you.  

Step two is optional, but you can break the news to your main friends and family first, before posting anything. That way, your inner circle won’t feel like you’re not trusting them and keeping things from them.

Bonus tips for the post you choose:

1. If you go with a text – keep it nice and short, don’t over-explain things. 
2. With photos, don’t rush to post just anything. Make sure the shot and the lighting look good, and that they tell a story.  

Finally, post your content and see what happens! 

Benefits of relationship soft launch

Relationship soft launch has its definite pros. Here are the main ones. 

1. Less pressure on the relationship. You’re not claiming to be each other’s partners, so there’s still room to explore and see where this romance is going. It is especially helpful if you practice slow dating.
2. Intimacy. When the relationship is just between the two people, it’s easier to open up to each other and show vulnerability. It’s almost like your little secret that brings you together. 
3. Avoid premature judgments. It’s easy to think someone is a perfect match when you’re only starting to go out and date. If you do a hard launch too soon, you might have to deal with the discomfort of removing this person from your feed and having to explain what happened to your friends and colleagues. Better follow the mindful dating principles and do the soft launch until you’re ready to move on to the next relationship phase. 

Is relationship soft launch right for you?

A soft launch, just like a hard launch, is completely optional. You don’t owe it to anyone to announce your relationships. That should be done voluntarily. If you feel like soft launching is not your cup of tea – skip it! You can move on straight to a hard launch, or not do both. Instead, you can tell your friends and family in person, or also keep it from them until you’re ready to discuss the details. 

Gentle tip: When considering posting your lover online, have a talk with them to see if they’re comfortable with that. If they’re not, it’s not necessarily because they want to cheat, are dating online outside of your relationship, don’t like you enough, or anything else. We all have different relationships with social media, and some of us are really not into sharing things online. It’s not always a red flag (although it can definitely be one). So have an honest conversation to see where you’re both at or even ask this question in every dating chat you have to see how similar or different your views are. Then post. Good luck!