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Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend for a Long-Distance Relationship

Can you imagine being in a long-distance relationship 20 years ago? No social media, no Facetime, slow and less accessible internet, and the first versions of smartphones that don’t feel smart at all if you compare them to today’s models. 

Thankfully, these days everything’s different. If you sign up for an online dating application and meet a cutie who lives far-far away, it’s not a problem to stay in touch, have heart-to-hearts, and keep the spark until the moment you get to be in the same physical space. 

There are so many ways couples can spend time together while living in different cities. 

Today we’re going to explore the funny, sexy, spicy, and insightful questions you can ask your boyfriend on one of your virtual dates. 

Why Asking Your Boyfriend Questions is Important

First off, let’s cover the basics and discuss why asking your boyfriend questions is important, especially if you’re in a long-term relationship.

First of all, communication is extremely important when you’re far away from each other. When two people date and they live in the same city, they can do lots of things together that don’t require much talking. And no, we’re not talking about sex specifically. They can watch movies, cook, eat out, and be together in the same room but work on their own tasks or hobbies, all without much proper conversation. 

Long-distance couples don’t have the same luxury, so talking becomes the focal point of the relationship. Lists of questions to ask your boyfriend become a helping hand when you don’t know what else to discuss. 

Having proper deep conversations based on thoughtful questions will also make sure you’re not drifting apart. It’s very easy to be constantly online and chatting, but still slowly going in different directions. With “strategic” questions you’ll be able to achieve several important goals:

  • Get to know them better 
  • Deepen trust and emotional intimacy 
  • Understand the key goals and values of one another 
  • Learn about expectations in the romance 
  • Deal with any misunderstandings you might have 
  • Identify and address pink or red flags 

Overall, if you want to really get to know someone, ask them questions that invite lengthy replies, and explore some topics together, it’s best to leave them for when both of you are relaxed and have a couple of hours to spare. For instance, when you’re having a remote date, and enjoy your meals over Facetime or Zoom. 

Evenings are good for those kinds of talks because usually that’s when all important tasks are done for the day, and you can fully relax and not worry about notifications, work chats, and whatever else is popping up on your screen. 

The Best Time to Ask Thought-Provoking Questions

Everything has time and place, and sometimes it’s not the best move to get deep and ask those thought-provoking questions that have been on your mind for a while.

For example, it’s not a good idea to have a deep conversation when:

  • Either of you is super stressed 
  • You’re short on time 
  • You’re in the middle of a fight 
  • There are lots of distractions 
  • You’re in a public space 
  • One of you is feeling under the weather 

Of course, your case might be different. If your partner, for example, lives in a vibrant city and calls you when they’re out in the park after work, you can have a deep chat then too because hardly anyone will be listening to your conversations. So you’ll weirdly have privacy in the middle of the crowd.

Lists of Different Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

We prepared a number of questions to ask your boyfriend about your relationship that can help you get the ball rolling. Buckle up!

Fun and Lighthearted Questions

Let’s start with something lighthearted and positive, shall we?

  1. What superpower did you dream of when you were a kid? 
  2. What superpower would you like to have now?
  3. Do you have any gross food combos that weird everyone out but you love it?
  4. What would be your first choice if you could teleport anywhere right now?
  5. What would be the first thing you do if you could switch gender for a day?
  6. Do you think you’d survive a zombie apocalypse, and why?
  7. What’s your favorite meme?

Deep Questions to Strengthen Your Relationship

Okay, we’ve warmed up with cutesy questions, time to dive a little bit deeper.

  1. Is there something that you don’t share with anyone but me?
  2. What is your love language? What love language do you prefer to receive?
  3. Do you have any distinct fears about relationships?
  4. What plays the main role for you in romance?
  5. What does your future look like in your head? What role, if any, do I play in it?
  6. What about our relationship would you like to cherish and keep as is, and what would you like to change?

Romantic Questions About Your Relationship

Now let’s add a little bit of romance to the conversation! Here are the questions to ask your boyfriend in a long-distance relationship about the romantic and more sensual side of things.

  1. What was your first impression of me?
  2. What do you think was my first impression of you? 
  3. How is our relationship different from anything you had before?
  4. If I could plan a perfect date for you, what would it consist of?
  5. What’s your biggest hope for our future together?
  6. Do you have a favorite memory of us? 

Playful and Flirty Questions

What is romance without a little bit of playfulness and flirting? Here are a few flirty questions to ask your boyfriend.

  1. What is your favorite part of my body?
  2. What do you think is my favorite part of your body?
  3. Do you like to get straight to business in bed or do you prefer longer foreplay and teasing?
  4. Would you like it if I were walking around the house naked?
  5. What’s a major turn-on for you? 
  6. What’s an instant turn-off?

Spicy Questions to Turn Up the Heat

Time to make this conversation even hotter with spicy questions to ask your boyfriend.

  1. If all people disappeared from the face of Earth and we were left alone, where would you like to do it?
  2. What if I told you there’s nothing under my trench coat right now?
  3. Do you think about me when you’re alone? What do you do with those thoughts?
  4. Guess what I’m thinking right now? Spoiler: it’s a dirty thought. 

Sexy Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

There is a fine line between spicy and sexy questions to ask your boyfriend, and here are some of the more sexual options to bring up in the discussion.

  1. Do you like to dominate or be more submissive in bed?
  2. What’s the best way to tease you and drive you mad?
  3. Tell me, what is your favorite sexy memory of us?
  4. If you could try any kink or fetish, no matter how crazy, what would it be?
  5. If you had to seduce me with one dirty text, what would it say?
  6. What was (is to this day) your top erotic fantasy?
  7. If I were blindfolded right now, what would you do to me?

"What If" Relationship Questions

Finally, you two can indulge in the what-if questions that are fun for exploring potential scenarios without the pressure of it being serious. You’re only being hypothetical right now, but you can analyze his answers and see what kind of person he is or the plans he has. 

  1. What if we could travel anywhere anytime, where would you like to go and for how long?
  2. What if I told you I was a billionaire, what would you do?
  3. What if we met in high school? Would we like each other?
  4. What if we had to do long-distance for a couple of years?
  5. What if you won the lottery tomorrow? 
  6. What if you could do something from your bucket list right now, what would it be?
  7. What if I completely lost the memory of our romance?

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

What are good questions to ask your boyfriend?

The answer to this question really depends on the situation. There is time for silly, goofy questions, and there is time for serious conversations and deep, insightful talks. 

Overall, it’s good to ask your partner questions that help you understand his soul. What is he like? What are his values? What is he planning to do with his life? Do you guys vibe? What is his stance on feminism? All those things are crucial to figuring out whether you are compatible, and whether he’s a genuinely good person who you can build a life with. 

Even if you’re not serious right now and the relationship is laid back, it makes sense to dive deep because you wouldn’t want to hang out with a weirdo anyway, right?

How do I ask deep questions without making it awkward?

Sometimes it feels odd to bring up certain topics and ask questions, especially if they’re not from your usual daily conversation rotation. However, this doesn’t mean that you need to ask them awkwardly and suffer. If there’s something you really want to ask, ease into the topic. 

Start with lighter questions or bring up something that would be relevant to the later conversation. If you’re worried about putting him on the spot, phrase the sentences so that there’s more of “I” than “you”. Watch out for his body language and facial expressions. If something you want to chat about makes him really uncomfortable, divert to something else or soften the talk. You got it! 

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