Orgasm Over Pleasure? Let’s Talk About it
Should we, perhaps, focus on pleasure more instead of stressing over climax? In today’s article, we’ll explore the topic of the highest sexual pleasure, look into the types of orgasms that exist, and try to understand what’s more important – an orgasm, or pleasure overall.
What is an orgasm?
Orgasm is a powerful pleasant sensation in your body that happens as a result of stimulation during sex. Orgasms mostly occur from stimulation of the genitals, but there are alternative body areas that can cause it.
Types of orgasms
Male and female orgasm is often associated with genitals, but it doesn’t stop there. Here are the main types of orgasms known to us:
- Prostate
- Anal
- Nipple
- Cervical
- Clitoral
- Vaginal
If you are confused about the difference between a clit and a vaginal orgasm, here’s the key differentiator. Vaginal orgasm comes from penetrative sex where the clitoris or the G-spot isn’t intentionally stimulated. With a clit orgasm, in turn, you are actively touching and stimulating this little part of the body that’s located on the exterior of the vulva.
As for the nipple orgasm, yep, that’s a thing! Next time you want to get a little spicy and cheeky in your dating chat, share that fun fact and see if your perfect match is up for some sexting or at least a risky conversation. Nipples and breasts are popular erogenous zones, yet they’re not the first to come to mind when trying to orgasm. It’s not entirely clear what part of the population can get to the finish line purely from nipple stimulation, but we dare you to try it tonight, either by yourself or with your partner!
There are also reports of the lesser known orgasms that are worth mentioning:
- Exercise orgasm where you experience this sensation from doing core-based exercises. We don’t know about you, but we’ve never been more excited about hitting the gym!
- Sleep orgasm, that is apparently possible for women too. Not surprisingly, there’s little research or info online, but it’s believed that if you sleep on your stomach and get an erotic dream, you’ll be able to orgasm even if you don’t have a penis.
Benefits of orgasms
While the big O needs no elevator pitch, you might still not know about all the benefits that orgasming brings to the table.
- Helps improve the mood by releasing dopamines.
- Reduces stress and anxiety through pleasure.
- Improves your sleep – how fast you fall asleep and the sleep quality.
- Improves overall physical well-being, such as heart health.
- Strengthens your pelvic floor, especially if you’ve given birth recently.
Last but not least, if you have a partner, orgasming regularly with them will bring you closer. Not everyone considers meeting sexual needs a part of mindful dating but everyone should. We’re not animals, but sometimes a solution to tension and conflicts is simple – good bedroom fun. Sex fosters emotional intimacy which brings people together and back on the same page.
Is sex without orgasm a failure?
We’ve just talked about the many benefits of orgasms, but are they the only thing that matters? The Once team says No.
While it’s true that orgasm is the ultimate pleasure that you get from having sex, the mere act of having sex with someone or masturbating on your own has its perks too. The topic is heavily understudied, but there are reports that you get part of the benefits from the act itself too. Pleasuring yourself or your partner, whether you climax or not will help reduce some of the stress, put you at ease, strengthen your bond as a couple, and help you sleep better. You probably won’t be as efficient with scoring those positives if you don’t orgasm, but you’ll get a portion of the good stuff.
On the topic of sex without an orgasm, since when has it become all about the destination anyway? The journey itself is a wonderful act that two or more people share. Exploring each other’s bodies, showing affection, learning about new erogenous zones, experiencing excitement from trying new locations – that’s equally if not more cool than an orgasm. Sex in a relationship is more than the end result, it’s a process and a beautiful one at that.
There is something wrong with disregarding sex if you didn’t ejaculate at the end. In our consumerist society, we often forget to slow down and enjoy every step of the way. Sex is an art form, and it’s there for us to indulge in it.
Pleasure vs orgasm
You don’t need to have an orgasm to feel pleasure. In fact, many practice the ruined orgasm exercise where they deliberately bring themselves to the brink of an orgasm only to intentionally disrupt it before climax is achieved. So as you can see, people have exciting experiences through all sorts of bedroom activities, and released orgasm is not always a part of it. Also, it is possible to feel pleasure without an orgasm, whilst you can’t have an orgasm without pleasure. So here’s what we recommend – try to have both, but don’t put too much pressure on every intercourse.
How to have more orgasms without stressing over it
First of all, don’t put orgasm on a pedestal. Is it absolutely amazing? Sure. Can you live without it? Absolutely. Whether you have orgasms or not, you can live a good life. Once you realize that and stop stressing out, you’ll have a higher chance of climaxing.
What else can you do to score more orgasms?
- Masturbate more often. Self-pleasuring is the easiest, fastest, and safest way to get to the big O. Try new toys, positions, and locations, or stick to your tried and tested methods, but do it more often.
- If you’ve been slow dating – maybe it’s time to reconsider. Don’t forget about safe sex rules and your mental health, but venture out and be more active with dating online to find potential candidates who’ll help you with an orgasm.
- Experiment more. Maybe you’re one of the lucky ones who can get a nipple orgasm. Give it a go! Talk about sex with your partners and ask what they’d be willing to try and share your fantasies too. Next step, make those fantasies come to life and make yourselves come too!
Why can't I orgasm?
If you’ve read all the how-to-orgasm articles, and tried having sex with several partners, with a vibrator, in all positions, and at different parts of the apartment, then there is a small chance that you might have anorgasmia or another condition that’s preventing you from this ultimate pleasure. Sometimes our bodies are simply too stressed, other times the lack of an orgasm is a symptom of a condition, and sometimes people just really struggle with orgasms.
To get to the bottom of it, make sure to stop by a trusted medical professional. There’s nothing to be ashamed about here, and they’ll be able to run a few tests and point you in the right direction. You got this!
