Essential Online Dating Safety Tips: Staying Secure on Dating Sites
However, not everyone who is dating online is doing it with good intentions. Sometimes you may end up in a scary situation, especially if you’re a woman. Although both sexes can find themselves in precarious circumstances.
We want you to only have the best experience with the dating app and going on dates, so today we’ll be sharing essential online dating tips for men and women to keep you safe and sound when you’re out and about.
Why Online Dating Safety Matters
Before we move on to the How, let’s identify the Why. There are many reasons why online dating safety is not something you should brush over.
Dating fraudsters are on the rise
Don’t we all miss the good old days when our biggest online scam concern was a Nigerian prince with his gold that needed investing? These days, many con artists turn to online dating in hopes of infatuating a vulnerable person and tricking them into spending their money on the scammer.
If you know someone who can fall for this kind of scam, send them these online dating safety tips right now.
Identity theft
Another way you can be tricked when dating online is actually very scary – you may have your identity stolen. Scammers will collect all information they can find about you online and they ask you questions to fill in the blanks. They can later use all the data to impersonate you and steal your money or commit a crime pretending it’s you doing it.
Cyberstalking or stalking in real life
Another way your life can be made significantly less safe through dating is if the other person starts stalking you online or in real life.
While they might refrain from hurting you in a physical way, this will still cause a lot of distress, and anxiety, and can seriously damage your mental health. They can harass you by following you around the places you live in, or leave endless comments on social media and even text your friends and family.
Physical safety
If stalking isn’t bad enough, online dating can also lead to very unfortunate consequences if the person with bad intentions meets you and is left alone with you.
Mental health damage
A very common risk of dating online (and offline too, by the way) is matching with a manipulating gaslighter who will unleash their entire arsenal of tools to ruin your self-esteem, perceived self-worth, and, ultimately, your overall mental health.
It’s sadly rather easy to build up a persona online and wait for the other person to fall in love with them. Once that is done, their real self comes out, and it can be too late for the victim to cut the cord, so they stay in those abusive relationships and only feel worse over time.
Key Online Dating Safety Tips for a Secure Experience
There are many ways you can keep yourself safe when dating online. Let’s go over the main safety tips for online dating.
- Avoid oversharing on your profile. Sharing is not caring in this case. Leave out last names, exact locations, and details about your employment and family. Essentially, don’t share anything you wouldn’t be comfortable telling a dodgy-looking guy or girl you meet at the bar. Less is more.
- Be careful with photos. Don’t post if you can see your house in the background or the inside of your apartment. Watch out for what’s in the photos in general. For example, if you’re sitting at a cafe, check that your banking card is not lying on the table perfectly in the shot. Also, refrain from sending live photos or videos in the chat because they can reveal geolocation.
- Don’t link your socials. There’s no reason for random strangers to have full access to your social media accounts. Only add the vetted candidates once you get to know them a bit better.
- Spy on your matches. If they’ve added information to their dating profile bio that lets you find out more about them – great! Don’t be creepy, but check out their vibe, see if something seems off, and watch out for mutual connections who can shed some light on this person.
- Block, report, delete. Whenever you get a weird feeling about an online chat with a person, block them. Don’t feel bad. And if they’re being especially worrisome, report them to the dating platform. Help keep the space safe, and watch out for your own safety as well.
How safe are dating sites?
Choose secure dating platforms with multiple built-in safety features.
The dating app or website can be an issue in itself. Not every company designing platforms for dating is equally reliable and trustworthy. Not all of them invest in security and care about keeping the data of their users safe.
Overall, if you go with key market players, then dating site safety would only concern you with regard to other users, not the website as a whole. However, even the biggest companies with impressive IT budgets can fail you, so try and do a quick research before you sign up. See what others are saying online, google to check if there were known data leaks and how they were handled.
Don’t worry too much about it, but still pay attention to the site's reliability and remember our dating site safety tips.
Last but not least, make sure you’re using a unique password to access the dating app or website. That way, if your password finds itself in the wrong hands, scammers won’t be able to use it to log into other important apps, such as banking.
Communicating Safely on Dating Sites
Here are the safety tips for online dating sites for when you’re talking in the dating chat.
- Keep conversations within the app at first, don’t move over to WhatsApp or Facebook Messenger.
- Recognize and avoid red flags in messages. There are so many options on the very app that you’re using to chat with this person. If they’re showing red or even pink flags - address the issue. You have nothing to lose. And if they react in a toxic way, block them and move on.
Planning a Safe First Date
Even if you’ve chatted for a long time and spoken on the phone a lot, you should still be careful when going on the first date.
- Always meet in public places.
- Tell someone you trust about your plans.
- Arrange your own transportation both ways.
- Have a plan B in case you need to leave abruptly.
- Refrain from sharing too much right away.
- Watch how much you drink and watch your drinks too.
- Ask someone to check in with you by phone or text mid-date.
Most of the time those safety measures would be excessive and unnecessary, but you shouldn’t push your luck. Those extra arrangements won’t take too much time or energy, but they can make a huge difference in a crisis situation.
Protecting Yourself Against Scams
Nobody is 100% safe from a scam, especially if it’s an elaborate and well-thought-out one.
Yet, you can protect yourself against the most common techniques. The most important part is to know about them, so you can recognize them early on.
- They tell you they are super rich and promise a luxurious life together.
- They’re asking you for money, regardless of the reason. People with sick relatives don’t register on dating apps and looking for financial aid there. It’s a scam, 100%.
- You can see their photos on multiple profiles with different names.
- If their profile disappeared and popped up again later. Maybe they were banned by the dating app but somehow made it back.
- They’re too invested too soon. Overboard compliments and enthusiasm are suspicious.
- Actively pressures you to see them in real life or give them your phone number, email address, or your real address. For example, pretending that they want to send you flowers or some other gift.
- Inconsistent with his life stories. One day he’s a banker living in Brooklin, the next day he tells you he’s never been to New York.
- Claims to be someone or know something and then display their ignorance. Such as pretending to speak foreign languages or having a certain degree but knowing nothing about the field.
- Says they’re from a wealthy country but currently living abroad for whatever reason. Side note: not every expat is a scammer, but it’s a common legend they use to lure money out of you or make you go on a date with them.
Pro tip on how to date online safely: Even if everything looks fine and there is seemingly no reason for you to worry, and your gut feeling is still sending off an alarm – listen to yourself. Our intuition is far more reliable than we like to believe.
If something feels off, create a bit of a distance and take things slow. If everything turns out to be okay, you will laugh about it together. However, if they’re actually planning something nasty, creating a relationship boundary can put them off of you. Scammers are after low-hanging fruits, and more often than not they won’t bother if the victim is self-aware and suspects something.
Final Thoughts on Online Dating Safety Tips and Positive Online Dating Experience
First and foremost, dating should be fun and positive. The world isn’t perfect, that’s why you need to follow the online dating safety tips we shared with you tonight. Stay alert, watch out for red flags, and be firm with your boundaries.
Once you get to know the person and see that they’re not weird or dangerous, don’t be afraid to open up to them and enjoy the process, no matter how long your relationship lasts.