How to Date a Police Officer: Tips, Apps, and Insights
So you’ve decided to try a cop dating website? Good for you!
Dating a police officer comes with its own perks, nuances, and potential downsides. Today we’ll talk about all three and share the tips on making the most of your cop-dating experience.
The unique lifestyle of cops and its impact on relationships
First things first, dating a cop is unique because of the lifestyle that officers lead. Those are not your typical 9-to-5 white-collar workers. Here is what makes them different.
- Irregular schedules. When you’re registering on dating sites for cops, you should be well aware of the long hours, irregular schedules, and last-minute assignments that cops deal with on a regular basis. It’s going to be tricky to plan family events and trips, but also smaller activities for the weekends or public holidays.
- High-stress environment non-stop. Cops, obviously, work in a very intense and stressful environment. They don’t necessarily stop being alert off duty either. They’re exposed to so much nasty stuff that it keeps them in survival mode even when they’re supposed to be relaxing. Similarly to doctors, they know all the horrible things that can happen, so it’s hard for them to slow down and enjoy the moment.
- Emotion suppression. Police officers are trained to keep their emotions under control. It’s paramount to their job to guard their feelings and not let them through. Sometimes it overflows into their personal lives, making them reserved and emotionally unavailable.
- External pressure. As you would probably agree, cops are not the most loved public servants ever. Some people go as far as to harass them and their families, which adds more stress to their already-not-so-chill lives.
- Team bonds. Just like in the army, the police force is trained to treat each other like family and stand by each other’s side. In some cases, their personal relationships become secondary to the ones in their “police family”.
- Unpredictable relocations. Not all cops are affected by it, but a sufficient number of officers have to deal with frequent relocations that they have no control over. This means they sometimes have to change cities and states on short notice, often leaving their friendships and love interests behind.
Common misconceptions about dating a police officer
If you’ve been wondering how to date a cop, you’ve probably heard about some of the common misconceptions that surround people in this profession.
Let’s cover the main ones.
- They’re always serious and can’t cut loose.
- They are emotionally unavailable.
- Their lives are always at risk.
- They’ll use their authority on you if needed.
- They never rest and are constantly overworked.
- They’re controlling and manipulative.
- They beat their partners.
Are those misconceptions true? They say where there’s smoke, there is fire. With cops, surely some of the things we hear about them in society are like that in actuality, but you can’t say that it’s true for every single person.
Just like not all Americans are oblivious about geography, not all cops fit into the stereotypes.
The appeal of dating men and women in uniform
It’s hard to put the finger on the exact reasons why dating men and women in uniform is so hot and appealing, but if we had to guess..
- Security. Having a cop bf or gf makes you feel safe and protected.
- They’re brave as they risk their lives all the time.
- Leadership is sexy, and any cop has to be able to assume leadership in a stressful situation.
- They are disciplined and dedicated, and their work ethic is above average.
- Traditionally, people in uniforms are respected in society for their services. Subconsciously it makes us attracted to them.
- They’re fit. Not all cops are ripped, of course, but the majority of them are in an appealing physical shape.
- Community-focused values that are necessary for every law enforcement officer make them seem caring and empathetic.
Overall, people in uniforms are intriguing. Whether that’s toxic to be aroused and attracted to them due to their work-wear is a whole different topic. If we look at what their uniform symbolizes though, it’s only natural to see them as prime dating suspects (pun intended).
Exploring Cop Dating Sites and Apps
Let’s talk about single cops dating sites and what to expect.
You will not have trouble finding a police dating app out there that suits your needs.
- Once – a mindful dating website with many cute cops looking to find a long-term partner.
- Police Flirt – another police dating app that specializes in law enforcement users and those who appreciate their profession and lifestyle.
- Police SIngles – a niche dating app for cops looking for all kinds of relationships.
Benefits of using a dating app for cops
You don’t have to exclusively use men-in-uniform dating apps or websites, but they offer quite a number of benefits.
- These platforms understand and recognize the challenges of policemen.
- They attract civilians who are fully aware of the nuances of police work and don’t oppose it.
- They give a sense of community and a safe space for both cops and those who want to date them.
- It excludes people who won’t see themselves dating a police officer.
Using a date-a-cop app doesn’t guarantee instant success, but it significantly reduces the chances of bumping into people who are not the right fit.
How single cops and civilians connect online
Many single civilians and cops meet through an online police officer dating service, such as one of the examples we mentioned above.
It’s also common for them to meet in social media communities and groups where they can share anecdotes, discuss real-life stories, post memes, and talk about values and beliefs.
By the way, many cops are conservative and appreciate traditional family values. If you want to date a police officer, you can try following online groups and communities on Facebook or independent websites that promote those things.
Another strategy could be to join communities based on hobbies. Many cops enjoy:
- Outdoor activities in nature
- Sports and team activities
- Riding or driving
- Doing charity work
- Playing board or video games
If you’re feeling adventurous and want to try any of these, you’ll likely meet at least a couple of cops after some time.
How to Date a Cop: Tips for Success
Dating a cop may not always be easy, but you can minimize potential issues with our actionable tips.
- Build trust with your police officer partner. Transparency on both ends is key. Share what you’re doing, what your plans and goals are, your schedules and anything else. Someone who risks their lives every day appreciates a trust-based romance, they’re not into silly mind games and inconsistent behaviors.
- Support his demanding work schedules. If you decide to date a cop, you can’t complain about his crazy work schedule, at least not all the time. What you can do to ease the burden is to plan with his work in mind. For instance, if he only gets two days off every 14 days, don’t schedule meetups with friends or different appointments for those days. You’ll have plenty of time to do those things while he’s at work.
- Communicate effectively in high-stress situations. It’s not easy to control yourself when emotions are running high, but you need to learn to fight sustainably. Don’t say things you will regret, explain how his actions make you feel instead of blaming him, and take time-outs if you feel you’re about to escalate things beyond repair.
- Adapt to his high-pressure lifestyle. Many cops want to enjoy a quiet lifestyle outside of work. Together you can embrace slow-paced activities and hobbies that will allow him to decompress. Think watching movies together, going on walks in parks and hiking, painting, or doing something else with your hands.
- Balance personal time and his work commitments. He can’t get out of most of his work commitments, but that doesn’t mean your personal life needs to be lame and boring. In fact, it will help your cop boyfriend a lot if you two live an active life outside of your careers. Quick trips, seeing different friend groups, going to language classes, volunteering, etc. The more formats you experience, the more exciting your relationship and life will be. You don’t have to stick to absolutely everything you tried, but selecting several activity types and continuing with them will have a positive effect on your mental health and romantic relationships.
- Respect his need for privacy and decompressing. Anyone who’s ever worked in a stressful high-paced environment understands the need to decompress after a tough day at work. Now imagine you’re a cop who risks their life on a daily basis. That requires some intensive relaxation. So if you see that your partner needs some alone time, let him have it.
Benefits of Dating a Police Officer
Here are the main benefits of dating a cop.
- Commitment
- Loyalty
- Sense of duty
- Security by their side
- Responsibility
- Problem-solving skills
- Respect for rules
Lastly, most police officers have a strong-knit community of colleagues and their families. Regardless of where you live, being a part of such a tight group gives you a sense of protection, peace, and camaraderie.
Cons of Dating a Police Officer
We’ve talked about all the good things, now is the time to discuss the cons of dating a cop.
- Difficulty with planning due to their irregular schedules
- High-stress lifestyle during and outside of work
- Struggle with getting through to their emotions
- Safety risks for the man himself and his family
- Public criticism and scrutiny
- Having to move and relocate often
There are really many downsides to dating a cop, especially if you’re risk-aversive and not able to deal with stress easily. However, if you don’t mind the lifestyle that many police officers live, then you will be able to find a caring, loving, and protective partner.
Dating a Female Cop: Key Considerations
Dating a woman police officer is not the same as dating a cop who’s a man.
- They’re highly independent and self-reliant.
- They want a partner who can make their lives better and easier, and not add more stress to the mix.
- The job schedule is crazy, yet many cop women find the time for their hobbies and interests outside of work which means not so much time for you.
- Her life is in danger regularly, but she’s okay with it, and you should be too.
- She has to deal with misogyny and stereotyping in this male-dominated field.
If you’re dating a female cop, you need to be supportive but respect her boundaries. If she says she can take care of something, she means business. Find different ways to show her your affection and reduce her workload.
Celebrate her strengths, achievements, and bravery. She deserves it. In turn, a female police officer will take care of you, and make you feel loved and protected.
Dating a Cop FAQ
Is it hard to date a cop?
It’s a bit harder to date a cop than an average partner because their lives are always at risk which adds stress and pressure to the relationship. On top of that, many have schedules that are not very friendly to anyone outside of law enforcement.
What do cops look for in a relationship?
Many cops want partners with traditional values, a strong sense of loyalty, and a focus on family. Sometimes you’ll meet cops who are simply looking for a good time and want to cut loose. If that’s the case, then they’ll be ready to ignore any incompatibilities with the lover.
How to deal with dating a cop?
Work on your stress management skills and learn to detach from the thoughts about what he’s doing at work. You can’t protect him from all the risks he’s dealing with, so it’s best if you learn to live with that without going crazy.
What are the benefits of dating a police officer?
Cops are protective, loyal, and traditional in values. Many of them will want to secure their partner from anything bad that can happen to them and create a life of leisure for them. They’re also great at dealing with stressful situations, and their social benefits are great too.
Can an undercover cop kiss you?
Undercover cops try not to put civilians in danger, so they’ll avoid associating with anyone unnecessarily. That includes people they might find attractive while undercover.
How do I meet a cop to date?
Your best bet is to try online dating to meet a cop there. Also, you can follow the traditional route and head over to bars where law enforcement officers hang out.